If you ever wonder…

Cuz that’s how my brain works. Always has. And it’s SO MUCH AND SO HARD to feel and deal with. It’s the reason I couldn’t just cut ties and leave him with nothing when I first left. ***I can’t handle how people will feel and hurt*** So the next time you are about to question me as to why I do or don’t do something or if you ever just ask yourself why I handle situations and people and my life the way I do, there is your answer. Write it down. ***I can’t handle how people will feel and hurt *** I know what it will feel like and I know what it will be like for them to go thru that alone. I feel it with them. Even if not at the same moment. Sometimes they have to realize first. Idk. I wish I could just take most of it and feel it for them so they would never have to know that that dire, would give anything just to feel the comfort of knowing they were not alone, that someone cares for them RIGHT NOW in this worst, most desolate, soul crushing, heart breaking time/moment of this life, kind of pain even exists. I would do that for the people I love if able to. Every single time.

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