Smoke Screens

and I would hate to be anything like normal
I can’t be anything like normal
I can pretend so good its disgusting
I’m anything besides normal
I lie to my face every time I look at it
I’m not anything like normal
I’ve lied and hid so many things its pitiful
I even managed to forget where I was most of my life
wiped away years of the steps I had taken
now I’m here and I can’t bear to be like the others
I can’t mingle and jest and enjoy the struggles
when all inside me screams I CANNOT BE NORMAL
truth is I’m far from it though
but I never show much because some of it is fucked up
I’m fucked up
I have fucked up
I have a mind that wants to be invisible
but at the same time I want it to be known
we don’t live in disneyland and we aren’t superhuman
all these rhymes are channeled through a certain part
don’t mistake it for something trivial of the sorts
don’t mistake me for someone easy to fall apart
It’s the only way I operate
but I have some things that itch and make living hard
maybe just in this moment
because yet again here I am alone and writing my heart
my story only comes out as silhouettes and emotions
weakness that makes me normal but I choose to profess it
I can’t be normal it wasn’t in my cards
but this is just another smoke screen
I know what lies inside and you don’t
I am not anything like normal
and it pains me to my core

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