The Gray

Jaw clenched. Can't comprehend, The vacancy in my chest; Again. Is this feeling You or Me? In-between maybe? I'm losing touch. Only tethered, with imagined love. Lust. Let me correct. Lie. About the Thoughts & Feelings. What you Mean. Who You are to Me. Something. Nothing. You have to be. So I can live in …

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Title-less

Drowning in something sublime.Yet, not quite Divine.Still searching for answers,In the depths of my own mind.Insanity's the key in deciphering;Reality. Repeated lessons,Have now led me to believe.I am no longer the same me; NotThe face all those eyes wanted to see.No endlessly seeking reflections.No more unwanted acts of depravity.Now I just crave the stillness of …

Walking the Line

The space between reality And dreams is thinning Unbearable so Its hard discerning the difference In that moment of waking Unbearable confusion has me Questioning Who am I? Where is this? What Happened? If it's not REAL Then why do I FEEL it? Every bruise and broken bone Every word harshly spoke Every choice. Every …

Untitled, 5

Just let who i am die already. After all, that's the one You blame; for everything. No sense in having this head game. Continue on, keep blaming me Like you always do. I'll take responsibility for all of your insecurities and everything else Your scared to; claim. Just remember to engrave the name Into every …

A Letter I will Never Send

Dear XXXX, Cant believe I am starting it this with these words, but I'm sorry for everything and the way things ended. I'm sorry I couldn't be whatever or whoever you needed me to be for you to be able to grow with me. I wish things turned out differently. You were the only person …

I’m Trying…

I'm trying my hardest not to miss you; everyday.

GET OUT OF MY HEAD

I'll never say it out loud But i miss you. The person, Not the hell we went through. But why? Why do my thoughts Constantly remind me. Of everything. No peace. Just the mess left, the heart; wrecked. Tears in my eyes at i write. Fucking up, cant even spell tonight. You left a hole, …

“Transparency, please?”

Make it quick, Or painfully slow. Take your time; Or, blatantly, let me know. Please, love; just don't Sugar coat. How you feel, Behind your ego. Physical attractions, Are fleetingly so. Emotional attachments Tend to grow. In intensity. Can you feel, The chemistry? Almost like An epiphany! Or is this the codependency? Or maybe; your …

Innocence Lost.

Innocence Lost. (with Amelia, Jigha, & Explicit) - - (Explicit) What the fuck is innocence? Mine died, A long fuckin' time ago. What the fuck is innocence? Is there; Anything good left to know? I said; What the fuck is innocence, Mine died, A long fuckin' time ago. What the fuck is innocence, Hmm... Guess …

Nocturnal Creatures.

Nocturnal Creatures. (with Amelia & Explicit) - - (Explicit) Night time, Be the right time, Let; The moonlight shine, Upon us. Smokin' on, That green pine. Sippin' on, That fine wine, That make, These minds, Six nine; With no trust, And all lust. ...... ...... (Amelia) Sippin' Moonshine; while that Moon shines, Diamond eyes And …

Wolves.

Wolves (with Amelia, Jeremiah, & Explicit) - - (Explicit) With the full moon, Shining; Against my skin, The silence of my soul, Starts howling again. Paw prints in the snow, Breath; Frozen in the wind. Aggression for protection, Natural selection, Is the exception for my sins. It's this moment right here, That my journey begins. …

Untitled, For…

I wonder, do you hate me? Or the fact that The Connection; the Love, cant quite be severed. Masked, buried, hidden; maybe? Dont worry; remember, I'm just crazy. (NOT!) Conscious just gets hazy. Too much 3D programming Running in the background. And there's the blue screen! Watch It all crash; crumble. The walls turn to …

Untitled 3

Drown me out, Take everything. Forget the sound, My light brings. Clarion call; Soul song, Quite an eerie Melody. Atleast the part I still sing. Questioning, The connection between You and me. That never leaves; Just gets buried Underneath, The Ego of me. Help me break free, And reconnect To the unconitional Love I seek. …

I miss you

I miss you when The seasons change I miss you on the good And bad days I miss you when my heart Begins to race I just miss you I miss the times we Used to share I miss the fact you're No longer here I miss the way We used to stare Like nothing …

Trust

It's my biggest issue. For fear of Rejection; Or could be the paranoia, From the schizoaffective disorder. Along with the bipolar. No reason to trust; When they all leave, or seem To judge. But then that's also my brain Fucking up. I don't talk about it much. If at all. No one cares, or understands. …